take this Hallmark holiday and shove it up your

Blah blah blah rant; blah blah blah rave but, wait… playlists:

Suck It, Hallmark:

• “Glory Box” and “SourTimes” – Portishead ‘Roseland NYC Live:’ Maybe the best one-two punch of gut-wrenching broken-heartedness ever recorded.
• “Can’t Cry These Tears” – Garbage: Catharsis is a lovely thought, but not so easy to achieve.
• “Why Can’t I Forget Him” – BlakRoc: I can’t wait for Nicole Wray to get huge and record a whole album like this.
• “Why Can’t I Fall in Love” – Ivan Neville: Yes, it’s from the ‘Pump Up the Volume’ soundtrack. And, yes, that scene is made of awesome. But this is also my favortie hopeful-ish blues song. Well, at least one of my favorites.
• “Ruin My Day” – Jon Brion: Painfully, painfully true.
• “The Moth” – Aimee Mann: What better metaphor to describe what we go through in the name of our beloveds?
• “Invisible Ink” – Aimee Mann: “I feel like a ghost who’s trying to move your hands over some ouija in the hopes I can spell out my name.”
• “Keeping the Weekend Free” – Liquorice (covering Franklin Bruno): I lived through more than a few weekends like this.
• “Harlan” – Freakwater: Not only is it a great “baby come back” song, it’s about a county in Kentucky, and it was written by a bass player.
• “Winter Winds” – Mumford and Sons: “And my head told my heart ‘Let love grow,’ but my heart to my head ‘This time no, this time no.’”
• “Ballad of Cable Hogue” – Calexico: “She promised me she would be there when I’d return: she didn’t say she’d have an army there as well. She whispered, “J’taime, Baby,” as she fired that gun at me…”
• “Modern Romance” – Yeah Yeah Yeahs: Depending on the day, this song is either hopeful or very depressing for me.
• “Romance” – Beth Gibbons: This whole album sums up a phase of my life, but this song could score the montage of, say, 2003-2006 for me.
• “Better Things” – Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings: Enough with the sad stuff: an empowering swat at the heartbreakers out there.
• “Here Comes the Sun” – Nina Simone covering The Beatles: If the Sharon Jones track couldn’t cheer you up, this should do the trick.

OK, Hallmark:

• “Shoe In” – Ida (covering the Secret Stars): Just listen to it. Simple, stunning, honest beauty.
• “Maybelle” – Ida: Walks the fine line between beautiful and sad.
• “This Tornado Loves You” – Neko Case: This sums up my “I would love you so much you couldn’t stand it” problem pretty well.
• “Yours Truly, The Commuter” – Jason Lytle: Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is someone else.
• “Don’t Take My Sunshine Away” – Sparklehorse: This song has all of the trademarks of a sappy love song, but is rescued by a Herculean does of earnestness.
• “Unsingable Name” – Mike Doughty: This song is the soundtrack to all of the times I haven’t been able to tell someone how I feel. There is a whole playlist in my iTunes built around this song.
• “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” – Lauryn Hill (covering Frankie Valli): A classic cover of a classic song.
• “That’s How Strong My Love Is” – Candi Staton: I think we all want someone to feel like this about us.
• “Winona” – Matthew Sweet: Creepy indie rock love song about obsession with Winona Ryder: what’s better?
• “Maps” – Yeah Yeah Yeahs: I don’t know why I love this song so much, but I do.
• “Rafael” – Seam: Indie rock honesty at its finest.
• “Suicide Machine” – Hum: A love song to an alien who got the singer hooked on drugs: “And all my wishes spin the fishes in the air and every one is a different shade of you.”
• “Apollo” – Hum: Similar subject matter to the above, but lonelier.
• “Fireflies” – The Quavers: One of my favorite songs ever.
• “Thirteen” – Big Star: If only high school had been like this.
• “95 North” – Ida: “After the first time we kissed I drove for an hour in the wrong direction.”
• “Shoe In” – Secret Stars: The original version of the song that starts this list. It’s so good it’s on the list twice.